Mishnayos Nedarim Perek 11 Mishnah 4
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נדרים פרק י"א משנה ד׳
If a woman said: I will not produce anything for my father, as that is konam for me, or: For your father, or: For my brother, or: For your brother, her husband cannot nullify such vows, as they do not fall under the category of vows that adversely affect the relationship between him and her. By contrast, if she said: I will not produce anything for you, including the work that she is obligated to do for him according to the terms of her marriage contract, as that is konam for me, her husband need not nullify the vow at all. It is automatically void, since she is obligated to perform those tasks. Rabbi Akiva says: He should nevertheless nullify the vow, as perhaps she will exceed the required amount of work and do more for him than is fitting for him to receive. If she does more than the fixed amount of work that a woman is obligated to perform for her husband, the vow will be valid with respect to the excess to which he is not entitled, and he might inadvertently come to benefit from something that is forbidden to him. Rabbi Yoḥanan ben Nuri also says that he should nullify the vow, but for a different reason: Perhaps he will one day divorce her, at which point the vow will take effect and she will then be forbidden to him forever, i.e., he will be unable to remarry her, lest he come to benefit from her labor.
קוֹנָם שֶׁאֵינִי עוֹשָׂה עַל פִּי אַבָּא, וְעַל פִּי אָבִיךָ, וְעַל פִּי אָחִי, וְעַל פִּי אָחִיךָ, אֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לְהָפֵר. שֶׁאֵינִי עוֹשָׂה עַל פִּיךָ, אֵינוֹ צָרִיךְ לְהָפֵר. רַבִּי עֲקִיבָא אוֹמֵר, יָפֵר, שֶׁמָּא תַעְדִּיף עָלָיו יוֹתֵר מִן הָרָאוּי לוֹ. רַבִּי יוֹחָנָן בֶּן נוּרִי אוֹמֵר, יָפֵר, שֶׁמָּא יְגָרְשֶׁנָּה וּתְהִי אֲסוּרָה עָלָיו:
Bartenura
קונם שאיני עושה על פי אבא. הקדש יהא כל מה שאני עושה מלבוא ע״פ אבא, כלומר, שלא יוכל אבא ליהנות ממעשה ידי:
אינו יכול להפר. שאין זה דברים שבינו לבינה. ובהא מודו כולי עלמא שאוסרת הנאתה על פלוני אין הבעל מיפר. וכן הלכה:
על פיך אינו צריך להפר. משום דמשעבדא ליה. ואע״ג דהקדש מוציא מידי שעבוד, אלמוה רבנן לשעבודא דבעל שאין הקונם מפקיע שעבודו:
יפר שמא תעדיף עליו יותר מן הראוי לו. וההקדש חל על החלק העודף שאינו תחת שעבודו, לפיכך צריך להפר, וההפרה מועלת בו משום דהוי דברים שבינו לבינה שאי אפשר שלא יתערב אותו העודף בשל בעלה:
רבי יוחנן בן נורי אומר יפר שמא יגרשנה. ועיקר מעשה ידיה צריך הפרה שמא יגרשנה ויפקע שעבודיה דבעל ואז יחול הנדר ותהא אסורה לחזור לו. והלכה כר׳ יוחנן בן נורי. ובאומרת יקדשו ידי לעושיהם, דידים איתנהו בעולם וחל עליהם הקדש:
קונם שאיני עושה על פי אבא – [It will be prohibited like] being dedicated to the Temple all what I do from coming [to work] for Father, meaning to say, that Father will not be able to benefit from the work of my hands.
אינו יכול להפר – this is not one of the matters between him and her, and in this everyone agrees that she prohibits her benefit upon a particular person, the husband cannot absolve it. And such is the Halakha.
על פיך אינו צריך להפר – because she is subjugated to him and even though that [stating that] something is dedicated to the Temple removes it from subjugation, the Rabbis strengthened her subjugation to the husband for [the use of] KONAM does not release from his subjugation.
יפר שמא תעדיף עליו יותר מן הראוי לו (let him annul it lest she place a burden upon him more than is appropriate for him) – since [the vow] of dedicating something to the Temple takes effect on the excess part which is not under his subjugation, therefore, he must annul/absolve [her vow], and the absolution is effective for him because this is a matter that is between him and her, for it is impossible that the surplus will not be mixed in with that of her husband.
רבי יוחנן בן נורי אומר יפר שמא יגרשנה – and the essence/principal of her handiwork requires absolution lest he divorce her and her husband’s subjugation will be released, and then the vow will take effect and she will be forbidden from returning to him. And the Halakah is according to Rabbi Yohanan ben Nuri. But when she says, “May my hands be sanctified to their Maker (i.e., God), her hands are already in existence and the dedication to the Temple takes effect.